Summary of Last Months Topic
It was a packed house for the first of our launched Living Room nights. We gathered around to hear stories from some of the amazing women that are a part of our Legacy Family. They answered questions and gave advice on how to deal with hormones and their affects on us.
Everyone agrees that hormones can have a huge affect on us, whether it be PMT, teenage girls going through puberty, hitting the menopause or other hormone imbalances that we might encounter, along life’s journey. These changes in hormones sometimes make us act irrationally (we heard stories of changes in character, acting violently, being moody) and out of character. A key theme from all our panellists who spoke on the evening was that hormones made it hard for them to know what was real and what wasn’t, causing them to do dangerous and risky things such as asking for divorces, running away from home or starting fights with siblings.
So if hormones can have such a huge affect on our behaviour, how we can understand them better, recognising what they are doing to us and then try to deal with them effectively? Here are a few tips from our evening on how to do this:
IN ALL SITUATIONS
· Accountability is key. Make sure that you have a group of friends or family around you who know the real you and who will recognise when you are acting out of character. These people will also be able to support you as you work through any issues around your hormones. Having close friends and family who could flag irrational behaviour was the turning point for many of the ladies on our panel to seek the medical help they needed to address hormone imbalances or to change medication (such as hormonal birth control).
· Dig deeper into God. God is our source, our healer and our provider, so our first step should always be to dig deeper into him. He made hormones and he knows what they can do, so pray into whatever you are experiencing. Commit to staying close to the church family and close to God.
· Don’t vent all your feelings and reactions on social media. It is likely that tomorrow you will be feeling differently, and you will see that you were influenced by hormones and not reality. If you instantly go to vent or react online then you can’t take that back. Instead, why not journal your thoughts and feelings so that you can look back at them the next day and test what is real and what isn’t.
TO MUMS WITH TEENAGE DAUGHTERS
· Be welcoming but not cringy. Accept that a lot of teenage girls just need to work through their hormonal changes. Help them to learn & understand their body changes and their sometimes-irrational behaviour. Help them to see that they are not abnormal by any means. Always be approachable and welcoming if they want to talk it through.
· Protect them. Especially if you have other siblings in the house, when you feel like they are in a hormonally vulnerable place (such as experiencing PMT), protect them for brothers (or sisters) who might wind them up or not understand how they are feeling. Make it ok for them to go off and be on their own if they want to.
· Don’t take it personally. When their hormones go wild, just keep loving them as a daughter and don’t take their comments or reactions personally. Your consistent love will bring reality into their hormonal situations. Don’t let your daughter see that you are upset by it – find your own space to deal with how they are being, think and pray about it before responding.
· Reason with them, don’t fight. Fighting will just work to reinforce their hormonal and emotional drama, whereas reasoning with them will help to show them it is not reality. Suggest that they write a diary to help them realise how it is impacting them.
GOING THROUGH THE MENOPAUSE
· Make yourself familiar with the symptoms. Be prepared for what awaits you and read up on potential symptoms of menopause, such as depression, weight gain, sweats. That way you will be more prepared to deal with them and not caught off guard.
· Exercising and eating well. Tips such as adding healthy fats, keeping off refined sugar, eating nuts and seeds, limiting caffeine, eating lots of green veggies and using herbs and spices to flavour can really affect how our bodies work. Exercising can also boost your mood and wellbeing and help you avoid mental health issues. Get yourself in the best place possible physically to deal with how your hormones will change in this period.
HORMONAL BIRTH CONTROL
· Try different hormones. If you are finding that the pill is affecting you too much, then speak to your GP or sexual health clinic to find out if there is a different hormonal contraception that you can try. The mini-pill and implant often use different hormones and might not have as big an impact on you.
· Look into herbal remedies. Some herbal remedies, such as evening primrose oil, can counteract the effects of hormonal birth control, so speak to an advisor and see what works for you.
· Try alternative birth control. If you find that you really can’t cope with the extra hormones that the pill or implant put in your body, then why not opt for something else like the coil which doesn’t rely on hormones to affect your fertility. Again, speak to your GP or sexual health clinic for more advice.
THE SCRIPTURE FOR THIS MONTH
Philippians 4:6-7 New Century Version (NCV)
6 Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. 7 And God’s peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
NEXT MONTH TOPIC
Sunday 29th April, is on Emotional Health. Please send any questions for the night to firstname.lastname@example.org